Achievement is something that as a psychologist, I would see through Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. The theory and principles of which are depicted above in an image. The pyramid shows the needs and drives that govern our lives. Achievement as opposed to the lower primal instincts and drives is a higher, more complex, self esteem based need.
Achievement can work as an incentive. The need to grow, to be respected, to gain recognition, to gain fame, to reach goals, to progress in career or any other attainment based motive can drive one towards achieving things.
We often fear what would happen if our children drop out, do not achieve what is required for a certain profession or admission to specific colleges. Stop right there. The pressure and bulldozing emerges from a herd mentality to compete and push our children like trained animals to achieve beyond their capacity at times. Be rational and practical in your expectations towards achievement. Target realistic goals.
Did you drop out or did a child drop out due to personal issues, learning difficulty, pressure or some other reason? In most cases time helps resolves their conflict and they get back to something they love. Overcompensation is a process where an individual tries to make up for something lost, inadequate or their so called mistakes. They internalize dropping out and try to make up for it. It becomes a drive. One step of success in that path will only encourage them to take up higher goals or newer interests or a job or work towards achieving something else.
Failures, setbacks, road blocks, slow growth, indifference and dropping out can be phases in some cases. This does not mean you should overlook and be complacent about it. Look up stories on google about drop outs, about those who achieved late in life or had a break through. A few examples I can name here are Mark Zuckerberg, Oprah, Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Walt Disney, Brad Pitt, Abraham Lincoln and Lady Gaga. Draw inspiration from other examples. Aim to achieve, be it as a grass root level or something within your reach. Use it to fuel that drive to achieve again. Don't let the need die. You never know!
How do you fuel this drive of addiction towards achievement? Let the individual be comfortable and free. Give them time and space. Let them work out their own issues. Let them find their own way by facilitation or with the help of a support system or professional. Let them pursue what they really wish to. Most underdogs and early failures emerge as greater success stories and super-cede their competitive peers in due course of time.
Image source- Creative Commons image search. Disclaimer- this is not meant to be a professional consultation session and is in no way directional or a substitute for professional help. This blog and its contents are personal reflections similar to an open diary, in the form of thought snippets.
